#there's things i'd do differently but it was fun to try :)
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happy tsukkiyama day to those who celebrate 🌙⛰️✨
like this art? it's a print, here! | like what i do? support me on ko-fi!
i'm so bad with dates i didn't even realize today's numbers were 11 and 12 ASKSKS (also i missed POCKY DAY? man, i had an idea for a doodle for that but oh well. i'll still draw it fdgfdhd)
i almost panicked about not having any art for tskym day bc cmon.... they're my boys........ but thankfully i had a deadline to finish some art prints last week and now here we are pftt
the process for this one is a little different from what i'd consider my usual way of drawing. i usually do lineart, flat colors, rendering, and yadda yadda, but maybe it's because i've been doing a lot of painterly disco elysium art lately that i decided to just paint over the scaled-up thumbnail and see where it takes me! (you can see in the timelapse me struggling over cleanly inking tsukki's face before i went 'screw this' LOL)
drawing this was pretty fun! i always wanted to try out my painterly style outside of disco elysium fanart and now i've done it! (well, done it again, bc i've kind of tried it for kghn day too pftt)
there is still something very charming abt the thumbnail in my humble onion, i don't think i was able to retain the exact silent tenderness in tsukki's face from the thumbnail in the final thing but oh well, c'est la vie dghdj (also me drawing yammers with visible nostrils jumpscare [this is only funny to me ASKSK])
#haikyuu#haikyuu!!#tsukishima kei#yamaguchi tadashi#tsukkiyama#tsukiyama#sunnysidedraws#sunnysideball#described#id in alt text
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How to foreshadow? Like a big thing is going to be revelation after few chapters so how can I drop subtle hints about it? Lots of love 💗
Foreshadowing Creatively
If you are trying to build up towards the 'big moment' throughout a few prior chapters,
Let's assume that we want to reveal the the fact that Character A's husband is cheating on her. The big moment here would be when she witnesses them kissing in the parking lot.
To drop subtle hints about it, we could:
Have the husband doing things that are just slightly out of the ordinary, but not enough to attract serious suspicion: taking call outside the bedroom, being more tired after work than usual
Insert direct evidence that Character A could've picked up on, but she doesn't because she thinks it's ridiculous to start having doubts.
Use symbolic motifs. The husband informs her that he lost is wedding ring - a complete accident. But this indicates a 'break' of their marriage vows.
Similarly, you can use color/animal/location that subtly hints at secrecy, infidelity and dishonesty.
It may even be enough to have seemingly unrelated bad things happen to her. Maybe she cuts her finger while prepping dinner for her husband, or suddenly starts feeling that their bed is uncomforatble to sleep in. There's no logical link between these details and the eventual realization, but the mood gets established.
Think about the big moment from two different points of view: someone who knows about it all along, and someone who doesn't. How would it look from an outsider's POV?
I find it helpful to think about howI tried to justify the bad events that has happened to me.
For example, I messed up on a math test. The logical reason for this was that I didn't study enough. But my brain would: - blame it on the weather: it was raining! And I hate rain! - the supervising teacher, Mrs. G, was my least favorite and that had affected my mood. - I always eat an even number of chocolate before tests, but I could only eat 3 that morning because that's all that I had left. - the bus came late
Drive your character's mood slowly towards the revelation. If it's an emotional one, I'd say the atmospheric/symbolic elements would be more important; if it's puzzle pieces finally clicking in place, you could provide a brief overview of how past events are finally put together by your main character at the end.
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#writers on tumblr#writing#writeblr#creative writing#helping writers#writers and poets#poets and writers#creative writers#resources for writers#let's write#writing about writing
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I hate fake and arbitrary divisions between "high" and "low" culture, but I do think there is an important (and morally neutral) difference between a story that's trying to say something important, and a story that is just out here trying to be fun.
Like Terry Pratchett is genre fiction, which is typically regarded by academic institutions and establishment publishing houses as low culture, but it seems undeniable that most of his stories are about moral outrage and love and free will. That is literature that takes itself seriously.
There's also The Hardy Boys Undercover Brothers No. 1: Extreme Danger, which thematically boils down to "Don't you want to fight crime and dye your hair blue? Wouldn't it be fun to fight crime and dye your hair blue?" That is literature which is just trying to be fun.
I would argue that most of the former category tries to be fun, but isn't just trying to be fun. I'd also argue that a lot of things in the second category say more than they are designed to say -- many Hardy Boys books are pretty blatant American jingoist propaganda.
#original post#don't quote me on the blue hair thing#i know they got SOME kind of of punk haircuts but I'm too lazy to check#85% sure one of the brothers got his hair dyed blue
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I know the headcanon is that Jan has been around, but what if he hasn't? What if he was the different one, the only gay in the village, who didn't know what to do with girls or how to ask a boy to kiss him. What if he fell in love with Bojan, but nothing ever happened, because Jan wasn't sure if he was just flirting (and even if he wasn't he still wouldn't know what to do with him)?
What if it was Nace who's been around? Travelling on cruise ships, playing with different musicians, open-minded and experienced, and most importantly accepted himself. What if Nace was the one who actually saw Jan? What if he was the one who taught Jan how it feels to be manhandled and how to touch a man, and that's why Jan has these huge heart eyes for him?
I'd love to know what their first time was like.
Darling, I'm in love with this concept.
Jan's decade-long unrequited thing for Bojan because his little singer symbolises everything he thinks he wants but will never be brave enough to ask for. Jan burying himself in his music because it's the closest thing he thinks he deserves to intimacy. Jan trying to find himself alone because there has never been anyone else like him to show him who he could be.
Meeting Nace.
Nace who is quiet and wild in equal measure, hypersexual but never without respect and fun. Nace who is unashamedly queer and makes a point of never letting young people feel how he felt as not a normal kid. Nace who recognises that it's exactly because of all the brutality in the world that it's a moral obligation to be hedonistic at any available opportunity. Nace who sees exactly who Jan is the first time they meet, but it takes until the second meeting for Jan to realise he's been seen.
Nace who opened up whole new worlds for Jan (and even made him tea and pet his cat afterwards).
Jan who finally realises what happiness is supposed to feel like.
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Snowball Mayhem
Wind stepped through the portal and into something cold and wet. The landscape in front of him sparkled in the sun, a gentle sea of white covering the ground. He looked down at his boots. The white stuff covered them, too. He lifted a foot. The white powder fell off his boot and disrupted the perfect white layer.
"What is this?" He asked.
The eight other heroes turned to look at him in various states of bewilderment, and Wind almost felt self-conscious. He didn’t like it when other people knew something he didn’t. It only worked to reinforce the idea that he was a helpless child, inexperienced compared to the others. Then a look of realization dawned on Warriors' face.
"You live on a tropical island," he said. "Of course you wouldn't have seen snow before."
Wind frowned. "Wait, how did you know my island is tropical?"
Warriors' eyes widened like he'd been caught in a lie.
"It's called snow," Time said. Wind sent the captain one last suspicious look before giving in to his curiosity and turning to face Time. The Old Man had bent over – his armor creaking like the hull of a ship all the way down – and grabbed a handful of the white powder.
"When it gets very cold, it snows instead of raining. That's why there's so much of it here."
The sailor gasped. "This stuff fell from the sky?!"
Time smiled. "It did."
"That's amazing!"
The other heroes smiled now, too. Wind wasn't childish by any means, and he could certainly hold his own in battle. But there was something endearing about how the young boy lit up as Time explained.
"I remember the first time I saw snow," Wild said, a wistful glint in his eyes. "It was on Mount Hylia just a few days after I'd woken up in the Shrine. The view from up there..."
His voice fizzled out, the champion apparently unable to put his thoughts into words.
"Does snow mean something different in your eras?" Hyrule asked, tripping nervously like he was trying to keep his boots out of the snow and failing. "Because I'm not really looking forward to dealing with poison today."
"What?" Sky asked. "What does poison have to do with anything?"
"Snow is poisonous? I still have the scars after last time it snowed."
Hyrule wilted a little under the stares that followed.
"Rulie," Legend said, "with every thing I learn about your era, I get more concerned."
Wind frowned. "So is snow poisonous or not?"
"It's not," Warriors reassured. "At least not normally. Your era must be an exception, Hyrule."
"Snow is actually rather well-liked," Time said. "Many children like playing with it because it can be shaped into small sculptures."
He pressed a handful of it into a ball between his hands in demonstration.
"It's a lot of fun."
He blinked at Wind. The small sailor barely had time to realize what was happening before Time launched the snowball directly into Warriors' face.
Everything was completely still for a moment while everyone processed what had happened. The captain blinked slowly like his brain was still catching up to the situation, snow dripping from his face. He raised a hand to wipe it away.
"Sprite," he said carefully, "you're a dead man."
He bent over and grabbed his own handful of snow, shaping it into a ball in the same motion. He threw it after Time, who ducked behind Legend. The snowball, which had been aimed for the Old Man's chest, hit the much smaller Legend in the face.
Warriors held his hands up in surrender.
"Sorry, Vet, I wasn't aiming for..."
"Oh, it's on, pretty boy!"
The others were quickly roped into the fight as they were hit by the fallout of Legend, Time, and Warriors' fight, and suddenly, the snowballs were flying left and right. Wind had never made snowballs before, but he had a good aim. Soon, he and the others were covered top to toe in snow. It was cold and wet, but a lot of fun, he decided. And afterwards, they found a little cave and got a fire going. Wild made something hot and sweet for them to drink, which Warriors insisted was tradition after a snowball fight.
It snowed more that night, and Wind sat in the cave and watched the white flakes float through the air in gentle swoops. It was cold, but with the campfire and a blanket around his shoulders he almost didn’t feel it. Wind had missed his home a lot since the first portal carried him away, and with the frequent monster ambushes, it felt like there was always something wrong or something to quarrel about. But today the Chain had felt like something more than a group of heroes on a business trip. It had felt almost like ... a family. It was nice to think of the others like that, Wind thought. He had a sister back at home. Perhaps he could have eight brothers while he was away.
That was Wind's last thought before he went to sleep that night. And it was with that thought in mind that he threw a snowball in Four's face the next morning when they woke to even more snow.
#fluffvember 2024#no.1#snow#lu wind#lu time#lu warriors#lu chain#lu fanfiction#sun writes#Twelve Months of Brotherhood
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no thoughts just Heiji Hattori (HD)
#detective conan#case closed#amv#my amvs#eye strain#heiji hattori#harley hartwell#conan edogawa#shinichi kudo#funimation english dub script#video#happy two-year anniversary to 'no thoughts just heiji hattori'!#while it's not my first amv (it's maybe my... fifth?)#it was the first one i made with davinci resolve and the amv that really got me into editing amvs for real#it's the amv that made me believe i could make amvs 🥺#and in remastering it i deeply understood how ambitious it was! i thought i did a lot of audio mixing for 'messed up'#but that's not even close to all the audio mixing i did here--cannot believe that i did all this for my first big amv project#it took about 20 hours *just* to remaster!#which is something i've been meaning to do for a while now so i'm very happy to finally share the results!#to make this a 'remaster' and not a 'redo' the only changes i tried to make were to the source footage and audio#video now uses almost entirely hd remastered footage from my blu-rays or netflix rather than my dvds#but oh gosh was it *hard* not to touch anything else! i'd do so many things differently now#but this video will always be really special to me (and i can't believe i did it at all tbh!)#i hope seeing it in hd is fun too! i'm so blown away by all the love this vid's gotten#and that it helped increase interest in funi's old english dub is amazing and 100% what i was trying to do with it!#thank you everyone for all the support <333 i wouldn't be the video editor i am today without this vid or your encouragement for it <3333#like the original the sources used are mostly from what funi dubbed (but mixed in hd by me!): eps 48-49 57-58 77-78 117 and 118 and movie 3#but i also used episodes 141-142 174 189 239 263 277 291 293 345 479 491 517 and 522#and ova 3 and tv special 6 (episode one) and movies 10 and 13 and ops 27 31 and 33 and the funi 5.2 dvd blooper for the one line lol#the song is 'you're stupid aren't you' by toshio masuda (from jubei-chan 2)
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having fun with colors for once :P
thanks @creepycoffins for the awesome dtiys :D
#creepycoffinsdtiys#trigun#millions knives#vash the stampede#i haven't drawn nearly enough knives. posted him even less#him and vash are so fun to draw :P ik they have the same face but it's like. fun to experiment with how different i can make them look yk#also admittedly. did most of this at work during downtime so if it looks funky..... my bad#the lighting isn't the greatest aight?? it's night shift and there's no windows but they do dim the lights#i did do the limited coloring i did at home lol. wasnt gon bring more art supplies to work#trying to get back into the swing of things with my drawing. i got myself a huion display for my birthday this year!#on top of my traditional i wanna do more animated stuff#primarily animated bc honestly i don't really wanna learn digital painting or whatever. im not interested in that and i like my harsh style#i'd also like to do more original work. i think last year was literally just trigun fanart lmfaoo#we'll see how things turn out ig#i'm not really holding myself to doing anything bc i don't see that turning out well. i am applying myself to more fan projects at the leas#tho those i'm applying more as a writer lmfao#well anyway. enough about me. i actually really like the drawing this was based off of! i didn't include the full body designs#and tbh vash's design is almost entirely cut out just cuz how the pose worked out :(#so i would highly suggest checking out the original art by the person i tagged!#and their other art's pretty banging as well :D
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Java stood at the beginning of the sand, right on the edge of the forest, and watched as Boreal made her way to the shore. She sat down just far enough away from the waves to not get wet, as if she knew the ocean like the back of her paw.
They weren't sure what to make of her. Chipper, upbeat… and rather unfazed by a random stranger dropping out of a tree. Was that a common occurrence for her? Nah. Maybe? Huh. Either way, they felt a little more at ease after crashing in on her, and slowly Java walked towards the Shinx and sat down near her.
Java's ear twitched, then they glanced over towards Boreal.
>BOREAL: .. yeah! It's not bad, it's a more popular place so other Pokemon stop by a lot!!
>JAVA: Oh okay that sounds better! I guess I did stop by too huh.
>BOREAL: YEAH LIKE YOU!!! Maybe we can build a sandcastle??? Though I guess it is getting late…
Boreal looked out towards the ocean where the sun was beginning to set on the horizon.
>BOREAL: I guess next time…
Boreal stood up
>BOREAL: It was Java right…? Well.. it was nice meeting you today!! I hope you're feeling okay after falling, though I think you seem good!!
>JAVA: Yeah it's Java! Likewise! Umm… Have a good night?
>BOREAL: You too!
Boreal made her way back to the edge of the beach, just where the grass and trees began before giving way to the forest. Like every night, she curled up under the tree closest to the shore on a large pile of leaves. The sun set, and just like that the stars lit up the sky. Java sat alone, slightly unsure of what to do next.
>JAVA: … I guess I'll try to sleep too. The stars do look gorgeous though, that's impressive.
#Boreal the Shinx#Java Riolu#Art Post#WE BACK HI HOW ARE YA#This took longer than I thought because I wanted to try different things for fun#Like the little talking heads I thought it was neat LOL#Something to break up a long chat between two characters#I probably won't do that often but now I have little bori and java heads to use though I'd like to do full emotes for them some day#My wrist has gotten much better so I can keep working again as long as I take it easy!#One more post and then you crazy folks can start asking Java questions
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(Idk if someone asked this already) since we’re on the topic of gender
sci what is gender to you and how do you see it in you and how you express it in your art?? (Just a young queer artist who wants some light shined upon them 🥺)
i 'unno ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
#gender is soup#sci speaks#i'm so sorry i know you might hope for something profound but... i think when i'm put on the spot like this i can't say anything really#i think whatever i am is definitely pervasive in everything i write#but like.. gender means something different to wade than it does for peter.#just like it'll be different for everybody. we make different associations based on our experiences and our trauma.#like.. wade associates femininity with love. because of his mother. associates masculinity with violence. because of his father.#peter associates masculinity with responsibility. because of uncle ben. associates femininity with confidence. because of aunt may.#i think there's all kinds of reasons why we choose to present the way we do. and what gender means to us.#just like we'll associate a colour with something. or a smell with a memory. it's complicated.#i don't think i'm some kind of expert on gender things but... i just find it interesting to explore. the psychology of it.#i don't think it's supernatural. it doesn't come from nowhere. but it should be a playground.#i don't think anyone in this world should be restricted to a certain role to play. i want to try all the roles and see how it fits.#see how well i can play them.#maybe because i haven't found one that quite fits. so i want the opportunity to try whatever i can. see what feels right.#i think it would be fun to be a wife. i think it would be fun to be a husband. i think it would be fun to be a firefighter. i think it wo#shrugs. different outfits for every day. different roles to play.#today i'd like to try...#i think it's like kids learning how to be adults by playing pretend. by playing roles.#i'm learning more about myself and other people and fitting into the world by trying on different roles.#kids playing house. you be the mom. i'll be the dad. yadda yadda.#i still feel like a bit of a kid who hasn't figured out how to be an adult yet. so i'm still trying out roles to see what fits.
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finally finished all of one character's entire quests/optional dialogue/questions/etc.... 100,000 words... .... aughhh
#Given some of it IS lines of code and stuff but like.. minus all that it's still probably at least 85 - 95k words hhhhhh#AND I have to do this for another 3 characters. Then a few partial quests for 3 others. THEN the other random misc stuff in the game#(like there are public areas in the city like a park and a forest that you can go and do a few things at. and chat with a few random#townsfolk that aren't actually full characters or anything. And there's a community board where you can#browse some of the random job advertisments or silly things that happen to be posted around#and also pick up a few odd jobs of your own to help earn coin to buy gifts for the npcs. etc. etc.)#Originally I was thinking like 'ah I'll make a short little game just to try it out! :3 It'll take maybe a few months!''#haha........................hee hee........................................hoho#Also evil that it would have been done already if I didn't totally drop itand stop working on it for like 5 years randomly#i could have made 5 years of steady slow progress gradually. instead of like 'one initial idea dump + about a month of art and writing'#...... 5 year break..... 'sudden mad dash to try to get probably 400.000 words written in a year or less' lol#I just really want to be done and have something out there already so it can lead to doing other things in my world..!!!!!! T o T#Like this can be an introduction and then maybe from that I can make other games. or short story anthologies. or other such things#But there needs to be some initially not very complex easy to interact with starting point first I guess... if that makes sense#That's part of why I stopped posting worldbuilding lore dump stuff as often because its' like.. massive walls of novella length#text are much more inacessible to engage with than like.. ooh a game! and there's characters! so its more approachable! and theres#visuals! oo! and the text is broken up in small bits line by line with other things in betwen! oo! etc. etc. lol#Not that THIS is even very accessible. I think dialogue heavy interactive fiction/visual novel type stuff is pretty niche and considered#boring or tedious compared to something with more ''gamplay'' like where you can actually move around in a world#and shoot things or whatever lol. But its an inbetween point. something SLIGHTLY#more accesible for now. Since i just dont have the budget or means or ability to make some skyrim type thing obviously LOL#Though maybe if theres any interest in the visual novel that could lead to making other things too. or at least I hope. I have a VERY cool#idea for a more ''gamey'' type of game that is a super fun concept and etc. but I would need to hire at least 2 people to make it.. ough..#I could do all the writing and probably half of the art. But I think I'd inevitably need a 3d artist and someone who can Code For Real hbjh#the system for ren'py (the thing I'm making a visual novel in) is not that complicated if you stick to just simple dialogue and stuff.#Making a whole moderately sized 3d game with minigames in it and a bunch of quest features and etc. would be out of my simplistic scope#''just learn it yourself!!' ... i barely manage to eat and sleep reliably every day lol... i do not function well enough to spend months#learning that many new skills. I already have a lot of of things I'm good at (not in a braggy way but just factually like.. i already have#a wide variety of different things under my belt).. at some point I have to just be happy with what i CAN already do and focus on that#and admit I need to get outside help sometimes ghjbh... NO more new skills/hobbies!!! ... ANYWAY
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Honestly, I was kind of done with the online left when people claimed you're a real life bad person if you
*checks notes*
Play the video game The Tenants (and similar)
Because you play as a landlord, and landlords are evil, and because you play as one, you basically are one, and you're therefor evil
No really. That's a discussion I had.
I tried to teach them the difference between real life and video games, between fantasy and reality, but no dice
I got blocked the moment I said that I'm anti-gun irl but still play shooter games every so often
Anyway. Many of the "progressive moral online left" would totally blame video games for real life violence
#Online discourse has warped your perception of what an actual problem is#And here's another fun bit:#I do not think that all landlords and renting in general is evil in general#I hate black and white thinking#Whatever happened to nuance#You know that a lot of things you hate about landlords/renting are bad people exploiting fuzzy laws?#Personally I'd actually rather rent than own#Takes a shit ton of responsibility off me#If the heating breaks down I don't need to pay anything or go into debt to fix it#What you hate is bad laws 95% of the time#I can't afford to buy either#But anyway#Try to learn some nuance is my point#Try to talk to people and learn different viewpoints#I'm happy to explain to you my reasoning btw
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marisha ray and liam o'brien truly will just sit there and roleplay and make me Think Things
#1h7m c2e36#text#critical role#cr2#cr lb#beauregard lionett#caleb widogast#r: empire kids#marisha ray#liam o'brien#marisha & liam#*meta#cr meta#cr1#keyleth cr#vax'ildan cr#ship: vaxleth#marisha ray supremacy#this convo about whether the murders on the dock are justified is so so interesting#at its core it's 'did we do the right thing?' 'yes we did' which is a convo keyleth had so so many times in c1#but this is a different flavor it comes from a different place for both of them#with keyleth and vax it was like#'did we do the right thing i don't know what i'd do if we didn't do the right thing' 'yes we did trust me we did we are trying our best'#with beau and caleb it's more like#'did we do the right thing bc i used to do so much wrong and i'm trying to be better but something here just feels bad'#'yes we did because you do what you have to do to accomplish your own goals and that's what makes it right'#in c1 the communication makes things clearer it focuses things for both of them#in c2 beau is trying so hard to climb over her own wall and caleb wants nothing but to hide behind his and they just don't /see/ each other#IT'S SO FUN. THEY'RE SO GOOD
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The last time I got a bit drunk I started doing my dishes and messaging everyone I knew. I was having 3 conversations at once and finally accomplishing a task I'd been putting off all day. how does THAT work. I'm inventing new unique ways to be a failwoman (gender neutral)
#i'm having the world's stupidest problems#if i revealed the specific amount of time i have spent procrastinating on trying to get a job despite waling up every day intending to try#you all would think i was insane#other life tasks too#sometimes i will want to do something and it will be like. okay if i was normal i could do this in months but#let's say 3-5 years#i feel bad about it too not because i want to be productive for some rich guys somewhere but because!#i have goals for my life i would prefer to stay busy and do something that benefits someone somewhere (not those rich guys)#i like doing tasks even#i would prefer to not be sitting here thinking#and if i could just master basic life tasks we could move on to fun creative goals i have too or things i'd like to try#anyway. perhaps i will just try different substances until i can hit the off switch on whatever that is for a sec#i really just need like 3 months of not being like this. total. forever#i truly think i could sort it out in 3 months
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you know what? i'm gonna say it. i miss being seventeen. not for the "glory days," bc they weren't, by a country mile lol. if i had glory days i'd say they were in 2020. but i miss the electricity, the constant undercurrent of euphoria and deep plunging black. i miss the fight i had. i was literally known for being scrappy. i was self-destructive and coping poorly, but goddamn if i didn't burn bright and long. it took me until my twenties to finally start to fizzle out. does the candle with its wax melted down to the base of its glass cage miss when the wick was lit?
#she bork#it's not even that i'm tired of fighting necessarily. clearly. if i was i wouldn't miss it. i think i miss being ABLE to fight. now i just#don't feel like i have the grit i used to have. i'm not sure if it's bc i'm healthier mentally or bc my energy has just dissipated over time#but i miss taking hit after hit (metaphorically) and wiping the blood from my lip and standing again and raising my fists. i don't do that#anymore. and again even if it's bc i'm healthier i'm not sure it's a good thing that that stubbornness and grit is gone. is it automatically#better to seek the path of least resistance? i'm not sure.#maybe it's learned helplessness? idk i mean logically one person can only suffer so much before they learn it's better not to fight or that#fighting isn't even always possible. but i've always struggled. i've always gone head-first into these things and white-knuckled it and made#it through even if only w self-violence (which was often remarked upon as self-discipline). now i feel like i just flounder and flop and cry#like a fish w a wailing voice on the dock as it loses its breath. i really do think it's partially bc i'm sane now but somewhere inside me#that crazy flame still dances. and ik that bc from time to time i still feel the heat against the sides of the glass. maybe it's a lack of#confidence. maybe it's that ik now that it's impossible to hate yourself into a different better shape (both physically and mentally). but#it was so exciting to try. if i'm miserable regardless i'd at least rather be having fun.#furthermore it could also be that my chaos is no longer external. a lot of what i have going on is internal/physical and it's a daily thing.#fighting daily is a lot harder than fighting through my shitty relationship or that one season of volleyball that destroyed me mentally lol#(ik that sounds ridiculous but it was pretty fucking bad). i'm no longer fighting against other people or external circumstances that i feel#a need to prove myself against. i'm fighting my own body which has proven a tougher match than anticipated. bc how can i? i live here. i#cannot will my body to function. i can swim against the currents of my illness and often do. but that's less glamorous than punching walls#and running for miles like i used to. i want to break a hand. i want to run three miles in half an hour. i want to doll myself up for a#dance and spend the whole night driving w the windows down strung out on a cocktail of cortisol and dopamine. i want to live in the eye of#the hurricane again. and i never will. and it's good but i think it's made me soft.
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Did all the requests I could today, hopefully I can get more done over the weekend, I don't like having requests older than a week in my inbox. Once I'm down to single digits again I might try out other request types, but I've been debating what I should try...
#Pokémon teams? do people like those? it's so up my alley‚ I'd love to try them out.#I was thinking different styles of moodboards and stimboards too‚ but I'd have to come up with a way to differentiate them all easily.#I don't do divination stuff. But I've always wantwd to try things like questions or something of that kind...#I just like talking to the people that frequent my blog. I guess. It'd for sure be a good way to do it.#Care kits!!!!!#Not fashion ones. I find those too stressful. But boy howdy do I love finding fun stim toys on etsy.#So many options... And I am only a little man with a little blog.#🔧 pit stop — chit chatting !#Excuse my rambling. I've been thinking about this for a while. And it seems like the kind of thing to post about casually.#Not to mention we already are 3/4 of the way to 200 followers!! Holy hell!
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#i just want to put this offer out there but if anyone who writes rogue ever wants to do rival type threads between her and laura#i think that could be fun/interesting#please don't hate me okay🙏#i just wanted to put out there I'd be willing/interested#i feel like laura and rogue are similar in some ways but also different#and kinda want some of the same things#if that makes sense#but laura would most definitely see her as a rival#again please don't hate me!🙏#I'm not trying to publicly throw shade on any character#i just think that dynamic has the potential to be interesting/fun#wishlist#unveiled / out of character
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